My name is Carly, and I’ve spent thirty-two years living in a body the world believes it has the right to comment on.
I’m obese. Not the sanitized, body-positive Instagram version people pretend to respect. The kind that attracts stares in grocery store aisles. The kind where strangers feel entitled to judge what’s in your cart, what’s on your plate, and whether you “deserve” to exist comfortably in public spaces.
I learned early that the world expects people like me to shrink.
To fold ourselves in.
To apologize.
To make things easier for everyone else.
That’s why, when I fly alone, I always buy two airplane seats.
Not for luxury.
Not for comfort upgrades.
For peace.
I don’t want to spend hours pressed against a stranger who’s silently resenting me. I don’t want sighs, eye rolls, or whispered insults. I don’t want to feel like a problem just for breathing. So I plan ahead. I pay extra. I take responsibility for my space.
On a recent work trip, I paid $176 for an additional seat. It hurt my budget, but it was worth it. Three hours of not being humiliated was worth every dollar.
I boarded early, found my row, and settled in. Window seat and middle seat — both mine. I tucked my bag under the seat, buckled in, and let myself relax for the first time that day.
Then they showed up.
A couple. He had that smug, self-important posture. She sparkled with the kind of confidence that usually comes from never being challenged. Without even looking at the seat numbers, he plopped straight down into the middle seat — my seat.
I took a breath and smiled politely.
“Sorry,” I said. “I paid for both seats.”
They laughed.
He actually laughed.
“Seriously?” he said. “You bought two seats just for you?”
“Yes,” I replied calmly.
“Well, it’s empty,” he said, already settling in like the conversation was over.
His girlfriend leaned closer and added, “It’s not a big deal. You’re being a fat jerk.”
The words hit exactly where they were meant to.
Old pain.
Old shame.
Old lessons about knowing my place.
But something in me snapped — quietly.
I smiled again.
“Fine,” I said. “Keep the seat.”
They smirked, clearly thinking they’d won.
Once we were airborne, I reached into my bag and pulled out a giant family-size bag of chips. I made sure to open it slowly. Loudly. Then I did something I hadn’t done in years.
I took up space.
Every inch of the space I paid for.
My elbow drifted naturally into his side. My shoulder rested comfortably where it belonged. I shifted. I stretched. I existed unapologetically. Every time turbulence hit, I made no effort to protect his comfort.
He started huffing. Squirming. Shooting me angry looks.
Finally, he snapped and waved down a flight attendant.
“She’s taking up my seat,” he complained loudly.
The attendant checked our row, then checked her tablet.
“Sir,” she said, “this passenger purchased both seats.”
His face drained of color.
“You’ll need to return to your assigned seat, 22C.”
The walk of shame down the aisle was glorious.
As he passed, his girlfriend hissed at me, “You really needed two seats just for being fat? Pathetic.”
I didn’t respond.
I pressed the call button.
When the flight attendant arrived, I calmly reported the comment. No drama. No emotion. Just facts.
She took it very seriously.
A harassment report was filed.
When we landed, I followed up with the airline in writing. I included seat numbers, names, and the crew report.
A few days later, I received an email.
The couple had been flagged for abusive behavior.
I was credited 10,000 bonus miles.
And the airline apologized for my experience.
That flight reminded me of something important.
People like me are constantly told to shrink. To disappear. To make ourselves easier to tolerate.
But I paid for my space.
And I deserve to exist in it fully.
And next time someone tries to shame me out of it?
I’ll be ready.